Tomorrow, I am finally having my operation. This means that I wont be very active on here for a little while and I am not sure exactly how long. I will be in hospital for approximately four days but it could obviously be longer depending on how I recover but I hope to be out in the estimated time my surgeon suggested. I will blog as soon as I feel able to with updates (AND PHOTOS) of my journey. I have never posted photos of this before so it may be quite interesting.
I am not feeling nervous right now and I am not sure if its normal or not. I actually feel very calm and peaceful. I am ready to start the next chapter in my life and this health problem has been burdening for me so long that I am very ready for it to be gone. I do not know what the outcome of tomorrow will be. Maybe my surgeon will save one of my ovaries, maybe he will not… I just hope it goes well, whatever happens. I am looking forward to starting my recovery, even if I will be in pain. Pain is only temporary though and the positive outcomes are enough to get me through the difficult times.
I truly can not believe it is tomorrow. It does not feel real to me and I feel like it is not actually happening. I have never had surgery before, let alone such a major one. I have never even broken a bone in my 21 years on this planet. I rarely get ill, I do not have any allergies or any other health issues and this genuinely is so, so weird to me. I have never stayed in hospital before so that will be interesting. They took very good care of my best friend when she stayed there so I am confident that I am in good hands, but the unknown is always a little bit intimidating and I am sure the nerves will kick in when I am waiting to go under tomorrow.
I am a huge control freak. I like to be in control of what I am doing and I am very concerned by the little details in life. Everything needs to be “just so” and to have that control completely taken away and out of my hands is truly the only thing that makes me nervous. I have zero control once I am at hospital. Being put to sleep is such a weird thing to me. I know so, so many people who have been put under and they say its just like falling asleep for a few minutes, even though hours have passed. I really hope that is the case.
I am not particularly looking forward to the amount of drugs that are going to be pumped in to me. Im wary of taking paracetamol so whatever they are pumping in to me will be rather interesting. I rarely take the Co-Codomol my doctor gave me to manage the pain I get because drugs freak me out so much. I don’t know why, I guess it is paranoia but I keep telling myself that I am in good hands and I will be okay.
Thank you to everyone who has been supporting me through this journey. To my family, friends and of course, you lot here on the internet. It has made my life a whole lot easier and less stressful and I am so grateful for all the kind words and comments I receive, wishing me well and asking for updates. It has been a bit of a tumultuous ride, struggling to get a surgery date and being drip-fed information, having to do a lot of chasing and phone-calling and of course, dealing with this health issue in the first place but I can not say thank you enough.
I will update you all as soon as I can! But for now, this is my final surgery update until recovery! I hope to see you all soon. Love Elizabeth xox